Arabic & Madrasah: My love-hate relationship with both.

Hi guys, 

I honestly don't know how to start this one, so I guess I'll dive right in: this post is about my struggles with Arabic, learning et all. 

As a child I hated Madrasah or (ile-kewu) as it's fondly called by the Yorubas, I hated it because the Ustadhs (Alfas) were MEAN, they had no mercy, they flogged for anything and everything, I was a bit of rebel growing up, still one.

So I started making up excuses not to go, Madrasah was mandatory when we visited my grandmother, it wasn't at my house, so I made up all sorts of excuses not to go.

I also remember seeing an Ustadh touch a lady inappropriately on the way home one night and that left a bad taste in my mouth, I was very young, but something about it did not sit right with me. 

Hence, the beginning of my struggle with Arabic. I left Nigeria at 10, so Arabic became alien to me, my mum did not mix and was not one of the Asalatu attending mums, it was pretty much school and home until I was about 16. I knew the last five Surahs, did not pray at the time so they were pretty lost in my head. 

At 16 a hijab sister around the corner from mine started an after-school Arabic class, I was in the beginners class with kids, back to basics, Alif, ba, ta .... it didn't stick so I stopped going. It reminded me of chanting in unison at the madrasah in Lagos. 

I went about my business until I was 17, that was when I started praying and became more aware of my religion and the requirements as a Muslim. 

My best friend's sister was visiting at the time, so I talked to her and she started teaching me Arabic, started from Alif again, paid her 20 euros weekly from my pocket money, went to their house from uni and then back home. She taught me how to pray properly etc, she called me "Aunty Ile Kewu ", I made some progress but for some weird reason, it did not stick so I quit, again.

Started learning more Surahs on my own by reading transliteration and playing the verses over and over until they stuck, stopped doing this after a while, and didn't go back to Arabic until I moved back to Lagos for law school. Woke up one morning and decided it was time to pick up the Arabic batton once again, this time I found a Niqabi, she came to my house during the weekend. I started from the beginning once more... the third attempt, I was 22 at the time, skipped classes a few times to go hang out with the boo, law school had me busy during the weeks, and Arabic can't stop my shine. 

I can't remember what happened, but I think she called me for class a few times and I cancelled because I had other plans so she stopped calling, she was pregnant when she started teaching me and when I decided to get back into it, she gave birth so I went about my business once again.

Arabic : 3

Rukayah : 0

I went back to my transliteration life and spoke to a friend who told me transliteration does not do the Quran justice, to enjoy it, you need to read it in Arabic, at that point I gave up on learning and was fine with my transliteration. 

I'm ashamed and also not ashamed to say it took me ages to recognize Allah in Arabic, it was that bad, maybe I should be ashamed. 

Then I woke up on a sunny morning in July 2021, at the age of 27, and I decided to start again, I messaged my friend and he sent me the contact of an Arabic tutor, but didn't message for a few days, mentioned it to the guy I started seeing a few months before, who speaks Arabic *hides face*. So I messaged the guy, paid for the class, drove to Lagos Island, parked my car at marina, took a tricycle to Central mosque, got a two Qaida/tira ( a learning book for beginners) and started class the next morning. The plan was to do three classes a week, early in the morning.

I told him I quit a couple of times but I know the foundation stuff, I kept the Qaida beside me and pretended I recognised the alphabet since it was on zoom, funny enough a lot of the stuff I leant from previous attempts came back, so the first three lessons flew in until I got to the ones I never encountered. 

But I was dedicated, so I breezed through, then I started missing classes because one thing or the other came up, and he started missing classes or was always late. 

I moved back to Dublin, I changed the classes to weekends when work started, first changed to evening then weekend. 

I finished the Qaida and moved on to the Quran in no time, this was early November and I got a rude shock, some of the Surahs I learnt as a child, I was reading rubbish, the pronunciations were 40% wrong so I had to unlearn. I also realised transliteration does not do Arabic justice as my dear friend said a year or two prior.

The class was going fine, slowly but surely, then I started to lose my cool with the Ustadh, dude was taking the piss, either he didn't bother sending the link, forgot about the class or was ridiculously late. So the progress was slow, due to lack of consistency, I had to keep going over and over stuff, you can't expect me to make progress without correction if you miss 3 classes in a row, sometimes we had one class in three weeks. 

I cancelled some and was late for some, but I always told him in advance, except for a few that were beyond my control. 

I started to feel unmotivated, so I reached out to a few people to find me a new tutor, he also became snappy when I made errors and I was not having any of it, I almost cried out of frustration during my last class with him, he was snappy and I felt bad for having to keep going over Surahs I thought I perfected.

The straw that broke the camel's back was he decided to double the fee two weeks ago without giving any notice or even giving a reason, paying was not the issue but you can't double the price of something and not give any form of explanation. 

I decided then and there that I was done, I sent him half of the new fees to cover for the three classes I'd done. 

I found a new tutor a lady and started with her on Saturday ( last week), we are revising everything I learned with my previous tutor, the fee is a tad bit over what he tried to charge as his new fee. For now, I am happy...

Do you think I was wrong for dismissing the old tutor?

I can read Arabic properly, a bit slow, but when I see people tweet in Arabic I try to read them, sometimes I give up when it's taking too long to read, when I see the tweets are ayah's from the Quran I try to read the tweets, then find it in the Quran, listen to the audio just to see if I read it properly or I butchered the ayah. Most times it's about 60-70% right.

Tarteel is also great if you are trying to brush up on your Arabic or memorize the Quran, the app allows you to read, follows your voice and highlights where errors are made.

I doubt I'll quit this time, so; started off hating Arabic, but I'm very confident about my progress so I can say I love it now and I keep looking forward to learning more Surahs, probably to memorising the entire Quran, who knows maybe i'll be able to speak and understand before I'm 35.

Allah knows best.

Rukayah: 10 

Arabic    : 3

XXXX

Kayah